So what are you afraid of?

February 23, 2026

This blog ain't going in the direction you THINK, cause FEAR, don't always show up as obvious anxiety, panic attacks, or breakdowns because your ex has moved on to a younger, shinier new toy. 

So let me ask you something gently… but directly.

What are you actually afraid of?
Trying again? Failing again? Starting over… again?

I'm seeing a trend with most recent clients in that, they admit “If I don’t try again… I can’t fail again.” And that feels safer.

No disappointment.
No embarrassment.
No proving yourself wrong.
No proving other people right.

But here’s the tradeoff.

If you don’t try again…you also don’t win again...you don’t grow again....you don’t build trust with yourself again.

Avoiding failure feels protective — but it’s also paralyzing.

The great thing about this is you don’t need more motivation. You just need a safer way to try. Not extreme. Not dramatic. Not “this time I’m going all in.”

Just measured.
Regulated.
Intentional.

Trying again don’t mean repeating the same pattern.

It means trying with new awareness....with better tools....with less shame....with support.

Fear says: “Don’t start.
Wisdom says: “Start smaller.”

Snack on THIS:
Here are my tips to get you started differently, adapted from James Clear, author of Atomic Habits:

Law 1: Make It Obvious

Your brain runs on cues.
What’s visible gets repeated.
If the trigger is front and center, the habit will be too.
Change the cue… and you interrupt the autopilot.

Law 2: Make It Attractive

Your brain chases what feels good.
If the old habit feels glamorous and the new one feels boring, guess which wins?
We don’t remove pleasure — we reassign it.

Law 3: Make It Easy

Your brain reads extreme change as danger.
Small, almost-too-easy wins build safety.
Safety builds consistency.

Law 4: Make It Satisfying

Dopamine drives repetition.
Shame doesn’t sustain change — satisfaction does.
Celebrate the small wins, and your brain will want more of them.

We’re breaking all of this down in real time during my next LIVE — with examples, stories, and step-by-step implementation. Bring your pen and pad.

Because knowing the laws ain’t enough.

You have to apply them.


So, let me ask you one more time
What are you actually afraid of?
And what would happen if you tried… differently?

See you LIVE on:
Mondays Nights at 8:30p CST / 9:30p EST
Wednesday Nights at 8:30p CST / 9:30p EST
Thursdays at 3p CST / 4p EST


Cashme outside anytime on YouTube: @dr.denise.thinks

Smile, it looks good on ya,
-Dr. Denise THINKS 🧠